It feels like all of a sudden everyone is a Chicago Cubs fan. Those lovable losers have finally made it back to the World Series for the first time in over seventy years; and the bandwagon is officially sold out. ESPN and FOX are in full blown pageant mode, and somewhere Bill Murray is crying tears of joy. Sure I get it folks, the Cubbies are a great story that everyone can get behind. And of course if you're a legit fan of the team then this is a huge moment in your life, and probably in your grandpa's life as well. After all its been since 1945 that they even made the Series and infamously since 1908 that they won it. Along the way there have been years and years of heartbreak, the Curse of the Billy Goat, and of course poor Steve Bartman. If I was a fan I'd be impossible to live with.
But let me be a voice crying in the wilderness to warn the rest of America about the dire consequences a Cubs World Series win could have on this great nation. We all know no one likes a prophet, especially one that brings bad news. But I will joyfully shoulder that burden if it means that the world stays on its axis for at least another year. Trust me, this is hard, but before you freak out and banish me to being a Mets fan (too late) please hear me out.
One thing Cubs fans have to own up to before they can truly enjoy this is the public execution of Steve Bartman. In 2003 the team was one win from the Series and winning the fourth and decisive game against the Marlins when this poor dude rocking headphones in the front row disrupted a potential catch by Moses Alou. The cursed Cubs went on to give up eight runs in the inning and lost. They then lost the decisive seventh game the next night, that they were winning as well, and somehow squandered. Superstitious fans blamed the whole disaster on Bartman, whose life was practically destroyed over that incident. So if the team wants to win this thing the right way they need to bring Steve Bartman on the field, shower him with love, and give him a seat for every game in the owner's box. Until then I can't root for this team.
One of the things that makes rooting for a perpetual looser like the Cubs so hard is also the same thing that makes it great. The ecstasy and the agony of a season, or one hundred seasons of futility become part of the very fabric of a city, and the DNA of its people. When that team finally gets off the schneid the momentary elation is great, but the loss of identity can be devastating. For the fans' sake I am happy the Cubs made it this year, but a win as well could be too much. Getting blown out would mean something to look forward to next season. Isn't that how baseball is supposed to work?
Lets face it people, we can't have any more crazy things happen this year. In June the Cavaliers won the NBA Championship, thus ending Cleveland's fifty two year professorial sports drought. That was a big enough sport moment for 2016. Sorry Cubs fans, but you have to wait till next year, otherwise the world may well end up going haywire. I hate that you have to wait but we really can't have The Donald be the president now can we? A Cubbies win might just push us over the brink. Enjoy being there and then go out and try to win it all next year. You'll have to face a dominate Mets team so there's that, but hey you never know.
Does anyone have any idea who Chicago is facing in this seven game tilt? Why its the Cleveland Indians, a team from a town that just had its curse snapped by Lebron. And lets face it folks Cleveland does not rock all hard. The Indians haven't won the series since 1949 and the Browns are probably the worst professional franchise of all time. Why not let the good feelings continue in a hard luck town whose river once caught on fire because it was so populated. Let them win this year so they can go back to being the mistake by the lake. Hey Chicago, at least you have the nation's second best pizza. Hell even Cincinnati looks down on Cleveland.
Finally, in your zeal to see the Cubs succeed please know that if they do we will be left without a lovable looser. We used to have the Red Sox in that camp before they won a couple. Now if the Cubs win we loose that drama every year that makes the season interesting. The other day I was brain storming about this problem with my father-in-law. The best he could come up with was the Washington Nationals. Yeah I hear you smirk at that just like I did. If the Nats are the new national underdog we're screwed. Baseball and this country need the Cubs in their rightful spot in baseball and in our hearts. Lets go Believeland!
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